The Power of Play

By Alex Schira PsyD

As parents raising kids today, it's easy to feel pressure to make every moment count. We

wonder if we should be reading more books, enrolling in more activities, or finding the best

educational toys.

But one of the most important ways we can support, nurture, and connect with our children is

through play.

Play is more than just entertainment. As humans, play is our first language—our first way of

understanding and interacting with the world. Through play, children build verbal language,

develop problem-solving skills, strengthen emotional regulation, and practice navigating social

situations. The American Academy of Pediatrics recognizes play as a critical component of

healthy development, emphasizing that playful interactions with caregivers support children's

cognitive, social, emotional, and language development while strengthening the parent-child

relationship (Yogman et al., 2018). Play is so important to optimal child development that it has

also been recognized by the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child as a

fundamental right of every child (Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human

Rights, 1989).

Adults often process experiences by talking, while young children process experiences through

play. Play is the most natural way children communicate. In child therapy, we often say that toys

are a child's words, and play is their language. While adults describe their thoughts, feelings,

and experiences through conversation, children express themselves by acting out their inner

world with toys. Through pretend play, art, games, and storytelling, children communicate

emotions they may not yet have the vocabulary to express. Play also allows them to work

through challenges, test out solutions, and make sense of the world around them. This is why

play is at the heart of effective child therapy—it provides children with a developmentally

appropriate way to be seen, understood, and helped.

A child who has started a new school may repeatedly play "school." A child who recently visited

the doctor may spend days giving stuffed animals checkups. A child adjusting to a new sibling

may act out family routines with dolls or action figures.

These repeated themes are not random. Through pretend play, children explore emotions, test

out different solutions, and make sense of experiences that may feel confusing or

overwhelming. Play gives children a safe way to express thoughts and feelings they may not yet

have the words to describe.

When parents begin to see play as communication, they gain valuable insight into what their

child may be experiencing emotionally.

More Than Just Fun.

While children are busy building towers, creating imaginary worlds, or playing restaurant, they

are also developing important life skills.

Play helps children:

● Develop emotional awareness and self-regulation

● Build language and communication skills

● Strengthen attention and executive functioning

● Practice cooperation, empathy, and problem-solving

● Increase confidence and independence

● Develop creativity and flexible thinking

These abilities form the foundation for success not only in school but in friendships, family

relationships, and everyday life.

The Importance of Child-Led Play

One of the most valuable gifts parents can offer is time engaging in child-led play.

In child-led play, the adult follows the child's ideas rather than directing the activity. Instead of

asking questions or teaching, the parent observes, joins in, and allows the child to take the lead.

This might sound simple, but it can feel surprisingly challenging. Adults naturally want to teach,

organize, or solve problems. Yet when we step back and allow children to direct the play, we

send a powerful message:

"I'm here with you. Your ideas matter. I trust your creativity."

These moments help strengthen the parent-child relationship while building confidence,

autonomy, and emotional security. When children feel accepted and understood through play,

they are more likely to develop self-confidence, resilience, and a secure attachment with their

caregivers.

You Don't Need Expensive Toys

Many parents worry they don't have enough toys or enough creative ideas.The truth is, children

rarely need elaborate materials to engage in meaningful play.

A cardboard box can become a spaceship. Blankets and pillows become forts. A few stuffed

animals can become a classroom, a doctor's office, or a family on vacation.

Children benefit most from caregivers who are emotionally present—not perfectly prepared.

Sometimes the most memorable moments happen with the simplest materials.

Quality Matters More Than Quantity

Busy schedules often leave parents wondering whether they're spending enough time playing

with their children.

The good news is that connection doesn't require hours each day.

Even 10–15 minutes of uninterrupted, child-led play can have a meaningful impact on your

relationship. During this time, try putting away phones and distractions, letting your child choose

the activity, and focusing on enjoying the experience together rather than teaching or correcting.

These small moments help children feel seen, valued, and connected. They also reduce power

struggles and create opportunities for positive interactions throughout the day.

How Parents Can Support Play at Home

Supporting your child's play doesn't require special training. A few small shifts can make a big

difference.

Try to:

● Follow your child's lead rather than directing the activity.

● Notice and describe what your child is doing instead of asking lots of questions.

● Allow room for imagination, even if the play seems repetitive.

● Resist the urge to fix, correct, or rush the play along.

● Focus on connection rather than performance.

The goal is not to create the "perfect" play experience. It's simply to be present and engaged.

Play doesn't have to be complicated. Some of the most powerful moments happen when we

slow down, follow our child's lead, and simply enjoy being together.

Because for children, play isn't a break from learning—it is how they learn, grow, and connect.

References

Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights. (1989). Convention on the

Rights of the Child. General Assembly Resolution 44/25.

https://www.ohchr.org/en/instruments-mechanisms/instruments/convention-rights-child

Yogman, M., Garner, A., Hutchinson, J., Hirsh-Pasek, K., & Golinkoff, R. M. (2018). The power

of play: A pediatric role in enhancing development in young children. Pediatrics, 142(3),

e20182058.